Why a Mother's Happiness Matters

With all the responsibilities that come with being athey perceive the world. Once your child moves out of
mother, can we really expect to be happy? Maybeyour house and beyond your direct influence, the world
we're asking for too much. And yet, happiness isbecomes their home and whether they believe it to be
important. We are told that happiness benefits not onlyfriendly or unfriendly will greatly affect the quality of
individuals, but communities and the greater society.their life.
Studies also show that happiness creates higherYour children are constantly looking to you for
incomes, stronger relationships, more friends, deeperpermission on how good their life can be. They are
social interactions, greater self-confidence, betternaturally filled with joy, but how much are they allowed
physical health and a longer life.to live? We are not going to allow our children to be
We may have thought our happiness had to be put onhappier than we allow ourselves to be. As you grow
hold, but we still want it for our children. We try to pickand expand your capacity for joy, your children are
the best preschool, feed them the healthiest food,freed up. Yet, if you begin to contract and shrink, a lid
arrange play dates and pretty much do everything wegets put on their joy. Notice how your child's level of
can to make sure they have all those things thathappiness reflects your moods. If being happy and
happiness brings. But what if we're missing the point?joyful is a priority of yours, your children will naturally
What if there is a more direct route to assure ourmaintain a higher level of happiness.
child's success and happiness in life? There is, andWhen you're happy, your children like to be around you.
that's your own happiness.You're nicer, you're easier to be with and you're more
Our love for our children is so deep that we often fearfun. This may not sound appealing when your children
that if we focus on our own happiness we may beare very young and you can't get a second to
taking something away from them. This is a scarcityyourself, but very soon you'll be grateful for that strong
thought based on the belief that there is only so muchconnection you have with your child. When my oldest
good to go around. It reminds me of the concept howson was born, my Mom said, "You're going to have so
could I ever love my second child as much as mymuch fun with him." I remember being taken aback a
first? But if you have more than one child, you knowlittle by the comment. I hadn't really thought of the fun
that love is expansive and you have more thanpart of raising my son. My mind was so focused on
enough for both or three, four or twelve. We live in anhaving all the proper baby supplies, reading all the how
abundant universe.to books and making sure that I knew how to do
Part of our job as a parent is to teach our childreneverything 'right.'
about the world they live in. Einstein once said there isYet, the gift of parenting goes beyond getting it 'right.'
only one important question in life, "Is the Universe thatAs parents, we are incredibly blessed to live with and
we live in friendly or unfriendly?" Ask yourself, am Iwitness the development spiritually, emotionally and
having a good time being here? Do I feel safe, securephysically of another human being. You're at the
and happy? Your answer to that question impactsbeginning of the journey. Enjoy it, savor it. And if you
your child because you are the filter through whichdo, you will have the luxury of living without regrets.