The Art of Making Peace in Jewish and Zen Practice

Today we are living in a world where conflict is ragingput your selfishness aside. When you learn to make
out of control and all are seeking ways of makingpeace with your family, then all other relationships can
peace, resolving conflict in the world, their families andflourish and grow. In Zen practice the students with
personal relationships. The practices of both Judaismwhom we practice are called the sangha. In this
and Zen, have time tested practices which lead us tospiritual family, we also experience and work through
become balanced, positive and clear, no matter whatour deepest needs and vulnerabilities.
is going on.The practice of sangha is to offer unconditional
The overall purpose of Jewish practice is Tikkun Olam,acceptance, encouragement, and sanctuary to one
healing the world. In order to do this however,another. The sangha comes from all walks of life, all
individuals must start closer to home. In Jewish practice,races, religions, conditions, and educational
the family is the core upon which the world is built andbackgrounds. As you practice together, you forge a
the home is the sanctuary. The family is the placeprofound, timeless bond and after years experience a
where we are taught to share, love, and grow into thedeep sense of oneness, wherever you go, you are all
person we are meant to be.one.
The family is also a place where we are challengedOf course, as in the family, problems arise in the
and confronted with intense, often conflicted emotionalsangha as well. These problems are fuel for practice
relationships. In order for us to have good relationshipsand an aid to growth. The Buddha gave a great
in the world at large, it is crucial to learn how to be atteaching for dealing with problems in the sangha, family,
peace with our family. This is probably the mostand world at large: "Do not look at the faults of others.
difficult challenge of all.Look at your own deeds, done and undone."
Jewish Practice teaches us that difficult familyZen practice focuses upon first healing the war within.
relationships are not a matter of chance. FamilyWhen you wish to create true and lasting peace, do
members are given to one another as teachers, tonot focus on fixing or changing others, or casting
learn grow, be able to correct past errors and developblame. Instead, take total responsibility for your part in
new parts of ourselves. Whether or not you like awhat is happening and look within. The only one you
family member, the bond goes deep. Overlooking thecan change is yourself. Zen teaches that correcting
difficulties and needs of your brothers or sisters isyourself is the best way to alter a difficult situation. The
considered a grave mistake. The way you treat yourmodern-day Zen master Thich Nat Hahn describes this
brothers and sisters is a training ground for yourbeautifully: "Although we cannot cover the entire world
relationship with the whole world. Jewish practicewith peace, we can cover our own feet and, one step
offers various mitzvot, actions to take and to refrainat a time, walk along, bringing peace with us."
from taking which serve to create healing and peaceZen practice reminds us that if you try to fix a troubled
in the family and the world.world while you yourself are filled with anger and
A foundational mitzvot is, "You are your brother'sconfusion, you are of little value. Your ultimate
keeper. Take good care of him." No matter whatcontribution is who you are. First sit down on the
differences exist, put your brother's and sister's needscushion and face yourself. When you are ready, you
above your own. Deeds of kindness are needed, nocan bring true ease of heart wherever you go.
matter how you feel. Share, listen, go out of your way,