| Have you ever considered hiring a "mother's helper?" | | | | care of the kids the entire evening. |
| If you have not heard of this sort of help before, I'll fill | | | | - They have fewer responsibilities. A mother's helper is |
| you in. A mother's helper is usually a pre-teen girl who | | | | not someone who is going to take care of the kids all |
| comes over to your house to help out with the kids. | | | | afternoon - you'd need an actual babysitter for that. |
| She can be an extra set of eyes, ears, and hands to | | | | Instead, a mother's helper is just that - a mother's |
| help you during the day - which all moms need! I had | | | | helper. If you need to nurse the baby but your toddler |
| two eleven year old girls (best friends) come over for | | | | is hungry for lunch, she can make them a PBJ. If your |
| the first couple of months after my second daughter | | | | younger child needs a diaper change while you're in the |
| was born. The girls came over after school once a | | | | middle of doing a puzzle with the older one, she can |
| week, and it was a wonderful help to me. While I | | | | take care of that while you keep having quality time |
| nursed and cared for my newborn, they had tea | | | | with your older child. |
| parties with my two year old. My older daughter loved | | | | - You are at the house while she's over. If you want |
| playing with her new friends, and looked forward to | | | | someone to come over while you head out to run |
| them coming over each week. It certainly helped us | | | | errands, call the seventeen year old down the street. |
| during the transition after the baby was born, and it's | | | | A big difference between a mother's helper and a |
| something I highly recommend! | | | | babysitter is that you stay at the house while the |
| Why hire a mother's helper? | | | | mother's helper is over. |
| - You are pregnant and need some extra help. | | | | Some things to consider when hiring a mother's helper: |
| Perhaps you're struggling with morning sickness, or are | | | | - Hire someone who lives close by. Ideally, look for |
| exhausted that last trimester. Consider hiring a helper | | | | someone who lives in your neighborhood or within |
| to come over and give your older kid(s) the energy | | | | walking distance. Remember that because they are |
| you don't have right now. | | | | too young to drive, you'll have to consider |
| - You just had a baby. It's great to have someone | | | | transportation. I worked out an arrangement with the |
| come and be a playmate for your older kid(s), throw in | | | | parents of my mother's helpers' that if they dropped |
| a load of laundry while you're nursing the baby, and be | | | | the girls off, I'd bring them home. |
| another set of hands to help out with the little stuff. | | | | - Arrange a meeting with the parents and the mother's |
| Having your second or third baby can be a rough | | | | helper before anything else. It's good to meet her |
| transition sometimes, and this was something that | | | | parents, make sure she's good with your kids, and be |
| really helped my family. | | | | comfortable with her before scheduling regular visits. |
| - Your husband is working a lot, and you feel like | | | | Ask around your church, playgroup, or neighborhood to |
| you're overstretched. A mother's helper is going to be | | | | find out if anyone has a pre-teen daughter who'd like |
| able to help you out by giving you a break when it's | | | | to earn some experience watching kids before they |
| just been you and the kids all day. Have her take the | | | | start babysitting alone. |
| kids to the playroom and color for half an hour while | | | | - Be clear about expectations. If you want her to do |
| you sit down to read a magazine, pay the bills, or | | | | some light housework (unload the dishwasher, throw in |
| make the grocery list. If your husband will be coming | | | | a load of laundry, sweep) then let her - and her |
| home a lot later for a few weeks, have her come | | | | parents - know in advance. Avoiding |
| over after school and stay until dinner time a few | | | | misunderstandings about her responsibilities will help |
| nights each week. This will help during "the witching | | | | everyone. |
| hour" when you're busy cooking dinner and the kids | | | | - This arrangement works well for both parties. Not |
| are getting antsy. | | | | only do you have help with the kids, but a mother's |
| - You have multiple kids, and are just feeling | | | | helper is getting experience at babysitting without |
| exhausted. It's hard being a mom, and having several | | | | actually having to "babysit." Parents may be more |
| kids spaced closely together is tough. I hear moms | | | | comfortable with their daughter learning the ropes of |
| with older children say how helpful it is to have their | | | | babysitting in a supervised setting, rather than having |
| older ones help out with the younger ones, but what | | | | their first babysitting job be entirely on their own. |
| about when all of your children are little? Sure, it can be | | | | Having a mother's helper come over once or twice a |
| done. But if you are able to have a helper a couple of | | | | week is an option that many of us may not have |
| times a week, it may make a huge difference. | | | | thought about. I talk to moms who would love to hire a |
| What's the difference between a mother's helper and | | | | sitter here and there, but they (a) feel guilty for leaving |
| a babysitter? | | | | their kids during the day, and (b) don't want to spend |
| - The compensation is different. Because a mother's | | | | the money. A mother's helper is a great way to get |
| helper is usually a pre-teen girl, you don't need to pay | | | | the assistance you need without having to leave your |
| her as much as you would a regular sitter who is older | | | | kids or spend a bundle. Remember, being a mom is a |
| and will be given more responsibilities. It's a lot different | | | | rewarding but challenging job, and having a little help |
| to have a twelve year old come over and help you, | | | | could go a long way. |
| rather than having a seventeen come over and take | | | | |