| Before I had even made the decision to have children, I | | | | - Do I want to make raising my children a journey to |
| knew that I wanted to raise them myself even if it | | | | be remembered of the first step, the first word andall |
| meant not having what others had. My decision was | | | | the other 'firsts' that are often missed by working |
| not based on 'If I could afford to stay at home' or 'how | | | | parents? |
| I was going to be able to afford to do so' but on 'do I | | | | - Do I feel that having children is primarily to have |
| want to be a stay-at-home mom and what was best | | | | children or is it to experience all there is in being |
| for my children?' I found that with most things the | | | | aparent? |
| 'how's' always seem to have a way of taking care of | | | | - Do I want parenting to be but a small part of my life |
| themselves once a firm decision has been made. | | | | or do I want it to be my life to be fully enjoyed |
| Because this may not be so cut-and-dried for some, I | | | | andsavored? |
| suggested to friends who were trying to make this | | | | In some cases, parents may decide that it is important |
| decision that they first ask themselves the following | | | | that one parent stay home with the children and that it |
| important questions: | | | | doesn't necessarily have to be the mother. The |
| - Why do I want to be a stay-at-home mom? | | | | decision may be based on who makes the most |
| - Will I have the patience to be with my children on a | | | | money. Fathers are increasingly becoming the |
| daily basis? | | | | stay-at-home parent because often the woman's |
| - Will staying at home affect how I see myself? | | | | income exceeds that of the man. |
| - Will it be advantageous for my children? | | | | At other times, the decision for a parent to stay home |
| - Do I feel they will benefit from having a parent at | | | | may not be a particular desire, but consideration of the |
| home? | | | | expense of daycare for infants and toddlers who are |
| - Am I socially able to spend an entire day with | | | | still in diapers. Also, finding a good daycare is a difficult |
| children? | | | | task. For many of the good daycares there are long |
| - Do I feel that being a stay-at-home mom is an | | | | waiting lists. |
| important step in being a parent? | | | | While my children were pre-schoolers, I believed very |
| - Can I live without the extras in my life in order to | | | | strongly that they should be raised by a parent rather |
| raise my children myselfinstead of leaving their care to | | | | than placed into a daycare atmosphere. For me the |
| daycare staff? | | | | decision was a simple one. |